Glitch # 1,296

It’s funny when you realize you have a glitch and you have no idea where it came from or when it developed. You just know that it runs deep and strong. One day a compulsion is there making you act or do.
Out to dinner the other day I asked my girl friend to ask what was in something. After hearing I changed my order. She was like, “Just ask them to leave the butter out.” I couldn’t, I just went with another dish. I felt – strange. Lately, because of this journey, I pay more attention to those feelings. I think them out later. Turn them over again and again when I have the time.
Upon turning this one over a hundred times I realized that it’s because I have a deep embarrassment when it comes to food. Like if I ask if something is healthy the person I ask will think, “As if you care, fatty.” Or if I order something like a salad I will get a look that says, “You are not fooling anyone.”
It’s another thing that doesn’t make sense. I know know when I got that way. What I do know is that I have found the glitch, so mow I can fix it. Slowly I will be whole and feel good without thinking about it CONSTANTLY!

See more progress on: Purge my soul.