Little FAT Me

I work full time and I barely have time to breathe. In 2005 hurricane Katrina rearranged my life, since then I have gained roughly 80-90 pounds. I believe that it started in depression and became an addiction. I have started and failed many diets and then decided that MAYBE if I combine diet and exercise with blogging and shopping I might be able to find success. This is the story of 2010 and my struggle to rise above addiction, pain, depression and fat.
My photo
30. Mother. Wife. Artist. Psychic (sensitive.) Writer. Singer. Rain dancer. Lover. Daughter. Sister. Child of God.

The road to MY PERSONAL goal BMI/weight!

Wednesday, August 31

September Challenge; Week 1; # 3

Zumba today, it was great but I have been feeling like shit in the sinus cavity! The marsh is burning up and the smoke is ALL up in this place. So the more you move, the more you breathe and the more you inhale crap. Therefor this week is done, it’s a three workout week. Hopefully the rain will come and stay a bit this weekend, then I can bust ass six time next week!

Tuesday, August 30

September Challenge; Week 1; # 2

Monday – I hit up a Zumba class and it was awesome! Like AWESOME! This is supposed to be a 6 times a week week, BUT that might have to change. Not only am I crazy right now, will the marsh fire burning it’s not safe to go out more than needed! As it is they have posted warning saying not t o take your kids out if it isn’t necessary.

Monday, August 29

Sunday, August 28

All the videos I have not posted!

Yikes, OMG kidds - seriously! I suck. Like, royally! The return to school has been hectic and scary and overwhelming SOOOO I of course have been barely hanging on. Which is to say, I have let my darling blog suffer. Sadness, and uncoolity all around.
Here - I will post the videos I barely made and JUST barely posted! Sorry!

Saturday, August 27

September Challenge; Week 1; # 1

Zumba – it was a really good class! I was so excited and my instructor was tired so I was worried. She killed as usual!

Weekly Meeting (Wk 67)

Some might think that this is done. I am, after all, at LIFETIME. Alas, my goal was not LIFETIME, but my personal goal weight was 127. I am starting to think I will not like that weight and will wind up happier at 135. A part of me wants to stop, not for lack of ability or being tired of the journey but because I am truly happy with my body and skin and do not want to lose more weight. I want my tummy tuck and I want to firm up some muscle, but weight wise I think I would not like to lose more. The thing that keeps this going, the thing that makes me unable to just stop and not get to 127 is that I have achieved each goal and I am a little scared of what will happen if I let myself “off the hook” on this one.
This week I was aiming for a .4 loss at the most and weighed in down 1.4 – for a weight of 135.2!!! Wow, just wow.

Thursday, August 25

August Challenge: Week 4, # 3

Zumba yesterday was so good! I am feeling a bit tweaked and stressed, but overall great. I think I need to remember to take it slow and get there steady. It’s just so hard! After being so held back for so long – I just want to explode.

Monday, August 22

August Challenge: Week 4, # 2

Shut up. SHUT UP!!! Okay, breathe. Today I went to Zumba. Today Zumba was canceled. I went back and forth about whether to go home or to the gym or what… I decided to go home, but then the skinny girl in my head got up, drop kicked the poor, out of breath, unsuspecting fat girl and took the drive over. We passed my house and wound up at the gym! I did a solid 30 on the elliptical. A good, sweaty, hard core, 170-180 bmp SOLID thirty and then – then I ran a father flippin’ mile! One beautiful, solitary, ten minute mile. It was like heaven opened and I was there crying and sweating and running! Next time I am doing two and I AM BUILDING BACK UP AND WINDING MY TIME BACK DOWN BECAUSE THANK YOU GODI AM BACK!!!!

Sunday, August 21

August Challenge: Week 4, # 1

This week is a three times week!
#1 – I went to Zumba and I killed! I pray to God that this sticks! This new I feel pretty good and it’s been four days!

I MADE IT!!!!!

Weekly Meeting (Wk 66) Lifetime!

So, after a hectic week where honestly all I could focus on was maintenance and moving forward I had a teeny “up” on the scale. I weighed in at 136.6 – which is .6 higher than last week. I count that as a maintain. More fun – MORE FUN – is that I got my Lifetime key! I am now part of Weight Watchers. PART OF WEIGHT WATCHERS!!!! Oh, wow!

Thursday, August 18

Auguast Challenge: Week 3; day 3.

Day three, workouts # 3 & 4.
Thanks right. I got half an hour at the gym and later went to Zumba. It’s so strange because these sessions would not have been an actual workout a few months back, but now they are the world!

Tuesday, August 16

Weekly Meeting (Wk 65)

Down, a lot. Down 3!
Total loss at this point 119.1 – my weight 136.
I look at myself in the mirror and I look like an alien. So foreign! I am shocked and scared and happy. It’s so insane. Next week I get my Lifetime key and in 6 pounds I will be done. ? How? What? Who, me? My original goal was to lose 100 pounds. Then I joined WW and found out that my 100 wasn’t enough so I picked 110 – it was the bare MINIMUM I could lose and be “healthy” – then on the road i said, “Wouldn’t it be funny to lose 125, that’s HALF of my weight since I started at 255, but 5 of it was that major binge the night before. 125 pounds would mean when I say I lost a person that I lost a person my size! Now, 65 weeks later I am seriously only 6 pounds from that!

August Challenge: Week 3, day 2

Zumba, it was a good one. I felt good and it was a heavy/light pace that let me go the whole time. I get really upset when it heavy heavy heavy and then light light light because I have to take major breaks and i get worn down!

Monday, August 15

Sunday, August 14

Week 3 - The Plan & day 1.

So the plan is to go for the four or more. Realistically, sitting here, I can tell you that it will be four. No more. The way I feel and the stress and lack of sleep that I am enduring is going to make four rough. I worked out yesterday (day 1) and I am glad, but I am back to pushing hard to get to 30 when on my own. I want to do more, I want to go further, but I am worn. I believe that I am going to coast, because if there is any chance of completing the mini tri I have to be health – as healthy as possible!

Friday, August 12

August Challenge: Week 2, # 3

:P – it has been an insane week. I am exhausted and really just washed out. I got to the gym and pounded out a half an hour. Tomorrow I plan on hitting an hour on the elliptical so I can enjoy my eldest daughter’s birthday party.

Tuesday, August 9

9 Aug 11

Made an appointment for NEXT Monday. I just do not know what to do. I still feel that fuzzy, sick feeling when I move. My head is pounding and I need to go to the grocer, I just can’t make myself go too far from a place where I can sit or lay down.

8 Aug 11

I feel okay. I slept all day yesterday, when I did get up I was dizzy and weak. Today was MUCH better, but I still have that sick, nauseous, drainage feeling when I move. I have not heard from my doctor so I plan on making an appointment.

August Challenge: Week 2, # 2

Monday – Zumba. The best instructor ever showed up 40 minutes into class and made the whole trip so worth it.

Monday, August 8

Sunday, August 7

Saturday, August 6

August Challenge: Week 2; # 1

I didnt go to Zumba, my instructor was out of town and my meeting ran late. I went to the gym and then to the grocer. The grocer is a workout! I can’t believe I used to move 117 extra pounds, just the dang full cart is HEAVY!

Weekly Meeting (Wk 64)

Thank God.
I am down, .8 – okay, I’ll take it. There are a lot of different dynamics to losing and I am only now starting to explore this strange in-between place. Not at my own goal, but not far from it. I have 9-13 more pounds to go. I have been working on more muscle, which could account for the smaller “loss” and I seem puffy so I am going to go through my journal and see if I can identify any higher than normal sodium foods. I hated seeing my poor feet so swollen, they haven’t been like THAT in almost a year!

Friday, August 5

August Challenge: Week 1, # 6

I did it. I went to the gym. I climbed the stairs and at that point I felt lightheaded, sick and sad. Also, while I am on the complain train I might as well mention that my knee has been bothering me for a while now and that run I got in this week really killed it. Okay, off the train, back to life. I went to the gym and hit the elliptical giving myself a quick 30 to get things done and call it a week! Yay! I burned 400ish calories, and I sweat my ass off! YAY!

Weekly Meeting (Wk 63)

Well, this is late. I have been having some problems with my 43Things app so I don’t get to update as often as I once did! This week I was up 2 pounds. I don’t know and I wasn’t too worried KNOWING I did not eat enough to make new fat. However as tomorrow (my weigh in day) comes I am staring at a possible “gain” again and I am frazzled. Caloric-ly speaking this is not right. I should not be up. Last week should have been a maintain and this week should be a loss of at least 1.5 pounds. Hmmm.
I know that stress can make funny things happen, and I am stressed what with not being at work and money and the cats. I also have not slept well – in FOREVER. It’s been rough, but rough enough to create weight gain magically? I just need to keep my head and keep the faith. In God I trust, I know I can do this!

Thursday, August 4

August Challenge: Week 1, # 5

Bam! I am nauseous and have the worst headache. I am also done! I went to the gym and wanted to push for an hour, but thought I might pass out. Boo.
Still, this week of six work outs is almost done. Tomorrow I am off completely, thank God. ;)

Tuesday, August 2

August Challenge: Week 1, # 4

OMG – you guys, it was a day. I got to run, I decided to try to just run a mile. I got two miles done. YAY!!! Then, because it doesn’t stop there, I jumped on the elliptical for a half an hour. Hell to the yeah!

Monday, August 1 Contest!