Little FAT Me

I work full time and I barely have time to breathe. In 2005 hurricane Katrina rearranged my life, since then I have gained roughly 80-90 pounds. I believe that it started in depression and became an addiction. I have started and failed many diets and then decided that MAYBE if I combine diet and exercise with blogging and shopping I might be able to find success. This is the story of 2010 and my struggle to rise above addiction, pain, depression and fat.
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30. Mother. Wife. Artist. Psychic (sensitive.) Writer. Singer. Rain dancer. Lover. Daughter. Sister. Child of God.

The road to MY PERSONAL goal BMI/weight!

Wednesday, June 23

Weight Watcher's doesn't want you.

In a few of my post, two I think. So start over. In a couple of my post you might have read that I switched meetings. The story behind that goes like this: I joined a meeting in my town, it’s a small town and we take a lot of crap because we are close to New Orleans and compared often as the Podunk sister, you know swamps, alligators, rednecks. Thing is we are good people and many who have just given the place a chance will admit that. We were WIPED out by hurricane Katrina, five years later we are slowly recovering. I am proud that I moved home, the only one to do so out of my small group of good friends. I am a part of the recovery of a way of life that is only possible down here, and I feel good about that. After hurricane and multiple relocations, after break up and break downs and make ups and I-still-don’t-know-where-we-stands I had gained 90 pounds and I finally felt like I could beat this. I joined a WW meeting in my small town. The meeting wasn’t large, maybe twenty people, led by a girl my age (which is kinda young in WW terms) and had a few drips but a lot of fun women between the ages of me and my mother (and a few roughly the age of my grandmother.) I liked it. I thought, “We’ll have fun!”
Week two I found out that they would be canceling my Saturday, small town meeting because we would not have a receptionist as of four weeks later. People we very upset. I was a bit disappointed, but I had just lost 7 pounds and wasn’t in the mood to get angry. Besides when something crappy happens after something good my mother always says to me, “It’s the devil trying to get you down. He always shows up to take something when you are happy, don’t let him win.” In fact I could hear her say that as the women bitched that the only other meeting with a good (ie. fun, friendly and laid back) leader was in the next town over, roughly 30 minutes away. Now, you see, some will read that and think, “What is a thirty minute drive?" I was thinking, "Not bad! Devil don’t win this time!” However, to most people who live in my town that is a long drive, and they hate being outside of our world. It’s a mindset that I shared until hurricane Katrina, after which a 30 minute drive is nothing! I left that meeting thinking that I had four more weeks to find a new location.
Week three and I was greeted by this overly fake blond woman with curly hair and an attitude. She is the regional? manager and she was there to quell our concerns. Apparently our leader had resigned, not wanting to be put on substitute duty, and this was our last Saturday meeting. (Two weeks later I would hear from a fellow WW who switched to the Thursday meeting in town that our leader was fired for being a flake. I would also hear a lot of other ugliness about of former leader. This was all being told to her by the Thursday leader. That's right, in a small town where gossip is never a good idea, yet another WW rep was disgracing Weight Watcher's by talking crap about a former employee. Wonderful.) I had a plan, I wasn’t too upset. I did become bothered as she spoke though. She was clearly defensive and aggressive. In my mind she made WW seem more like the ass holes that some of the women thought they were. When she was asked why a non-goal WW person couldn’t be the receptionist she stated, “This is a business, would you want someone, uh,” pointing at a few women in the front row, “or, someone like me, who is slim and at weight to be your spokes person? I mean, we have a front to maintain and like any business we want it maintained by people, who, look or who, make it clear the product works.” It was more than rude, it was ugly. Several times she yelled when responding to questions or concerns. Finally I raised my hand. I said, “I’m sorry, this isn’t going to get better. As you can tell they loved Jess and after only two weeks I know why. I can’t stay much longer, and I want my sticker!” It was enough to lighten things and stop and do rewards. I don’t understand how she could be in her position and let things get so out of control. I don’t see how she could have been through the weight loss struggle and been so rude and cruel. I don’t know what the powers that be are thinking when they make a decision that that woman would be a good face and voice for their product.
Knowing that it is hard for my fellow small towners to leave hometree I offered a car pool at my place the next week and I had two of the ladies show. The leader at our new meeting is amazing. She has all the qualities of a grandmother, a sex toy seller and an Avon lady; loud, quick witted, snarky, fun and giving. She is engaging and she seems like she knows where she came from. She’s been on plan 26 years and has still managed to avoid taking on that holier than thou scent.
Week five another woman joined us, and it’s been good. I enjoy having the company on the drive, we are like our own little support group. We sit together and talk together. I am happy. I don’t care that one woman is a dragon; she will not stop me from working the plan. I hope that while Weight Watchers protects there business as any business would, they don’t feel the way she clearly felt. I would be a great spokesperson for them, as would my car pool buds. We are lucky to have them and they are lucky to have us. I promote WW constantly on this site and am recruiting in person as well. It seems silly to think that just ‘cause I am big now people cannot relate to my struggle or appreciate my success!

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